60 Ways to Piss off Uchiha Itachi
by Nightly Halo
Summary: it's as the title says, or you can call it 60 ways to get a very painful death. This i think is also a must for any Itachi fan xD Just imagine Chibi!Itachi and Chibi!Akatsuki while you read this....trust me


**A/N: **Introducing...60 ways to piss off Itachi!! (aka get a slow agonizingly painful death D )

**Disclaimer:** I no own Uchiha Itachi...or Hot Topic xD

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1. Walk up to him and say, "Hi"

2. Ask him why he didn't kill Sasuke and keep asking, "Why?" over and over again

3. Drop a pail of chile/sour cream (mixed) on him

4. Stare at him for no reason

5.Point to a part of your face, keep telling him he's got something "rrrriiiiggghhhttt there, no here, no HERE, here damn it! I GIVE UP!" and stomp out madly

6. Steal his nail polish and tell him Orochimaru took it

7. Trick him into swearing that he will never kill again-

8.--when (if!) you do show Sasuke where Itachi is hiding (at the time)

9. Make Kisame raise his hand and say with an austrilian accent, "I am a nice shark, not a mindless eatin' machine, fish are friends, not food" and try to get Itachi to do the same

10. Look at his nails, scream, "BLOODY MURDER!!" and pretend to faint

11. Ask him where he got his nail polish (they actually have the same colour at hottopic D)

12. When he falls asleep steal his clothes-

13.-- and paint his nails pink color

14. Mess up his hair and ask him why he overslept

15. Yell, "damn!" for no reason then when he asks you what happened, then say, "nothing..." with shifty eyes

16. Say random things

17. Poke him at random times

18. Keep pretending to throw shurikens or kunais at him (but don't!) and tell him that you thought you heard something past him

19. Ask him if you can use him and his brother in your disfunuctional family class

20. Ask him if you can use him as a pratice dummy for fighting

21. Ask him if he can be your disection project

22. When he's spying on Naruto tell everyone where he's hiding

23. Ask him where he got his contacts and ask how much they cost

24. Keep changing your accent when talking

25. Ask him if he'll kill your family for you, when he says, "no" then ask him, "Why?! You killed your's and this time, make SURE that you get the brother"

26. Pratice random jutsu's on him when he's least expecting it and tell him your just checking his reflexes

27. Blame him for everything that happens (like the rain)

28. Say he's not special and you've also got the Sharingan, its just that your wearing contacts

29. Ask him for different ways to piss him off and don't stop until he helps you

30. Try to smuggle out his feelings for Sasuke-

31.--when (again if!) you do tell Sasuke-

32.--tell everyone-

33.--tell everyone that HE knows for that matter

34. Ask him about that sleepover that inculded cell 7

35. Yell, "SHUT UP!" at him when he's not talking

36. Scream 'Mistakes,' 'Boulvard of Broken Dreams,' 'Silver and Cold,' and 'My U.S.A of Whatever' when he starts talking at the top of your lungs

37. Scream, then say that you thought you saw the nine-tail fox again

38. Ask him if you can borrow his cloak

39. Tell him that the cloak doesn't match his eyes and make a huge fuss about it

40. When Orochimaru walks by, hug Itachi and yell, "He's MINE"

41. Keep asking, "watcha doin?"

42. When he fights Sasuke, cheer Sasuke on

43. Say, "Itachi has a heart of gold... if you understand him"

44. Go through mood swings for no reason

45. Tell him, you saw him taking ballet lessons a few days ago.

46. When Kisame is gone say you're having shark fin soup

47. Buy him a Sasuke pin cushion (a.k.a. voodoo doll) and needles for Christmas (or Hunakah for those Jewish people)

48. Tell him he broke a nail... again

49. When he cooks something ask him if its still alive

50. Ask him if he's a virgin-

51. --ask him why

52. Keep rambling on about something.

53. Steal his headband

54. Ask him how he scratched his headband

55. Try and get 'Butterfly' (by Smile DK) stuck in his head

56. Ask Itachi, "Why do you get a konoha symbol on your headband and Kisame gets these four lines"

57. Scream at the top of your lungs and say you saw an ant

58. Ask him if he works with Satan

59. Sing 'Dream a Dream' over and over again

60. Start a rumour about him and Sakura

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**A/N: **Don't forget, this is just for fun D I thought it was pretty funny xD


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